| Commitment is a complicated thing. People struggle | | | | criticism. |
| with abilities to maintain relationship promises. Many | | | | But, be leery about the person that suddenly |
| times the problem is not the partner then chose, but | | | | professes to a great belief in religion, or church-going |
| rather realizing this choice outweighs any other | | | | behavior. Sudden church attendance is not good |
| choices. It might not be whether they love or don't | | | | enough! Anyone can go to church, but that does not |
| love their partner, it's a feeling of being trapped by | | | | prove they are really sincere. Time and actions will be |
| their own choices that renders them incapable to | | | | the final of their proclaimed statements. |
| follow through. | | | | They Did NOT Change If ... |
| Everyone, naturally, wants to believe their partner | | | | They continue to blame for their actions and |
| would never hurt them. Perhaps they truly regret | | | | behaviors. |
| what they've done, and vow never to do it again. | | | | They pressure you to let them move back in. |
| However, promises and words don't make it so. | | | | They won't admit to their responsibility in the |
| Impulses are strong, and they may not be able to | | | | breakup. |
| fulfill commitments. | | | | They suggest everything was in you head, or that |
| So, how can you know if they really have changed? | | | | you were just acting crazy. |
| Truthfully, you can never be absolutely sure, but you | | | | They demand that you account for your wear |
| can look for some signs to help you decide. | | | | abouts every minuted of each day. |
| They changed if ... | | | | They try to keep you from your friends. |
| They are willing to wait however long it takes for | | | | They constantly interrupt or talk over you when |
| the trust to be rebuilt without pressuring or | | | | others are around. |
| demanding. | | | | They take offense to criticism. |
| They respect your beliefs and opinions. | | | | They have not changed mindsets about women (or |
| They communicate openly. | | | | men), and may suggest you are only a second-class |
| They show no signs of controlling or domination. | | | | citizen. |
| They are willing to talk with a counselor. | | | | They get upset if you don't believe they've changed. |
| They take responsibility for their actions without | | | | Trust is harder to build and maintain than breaking up, |
| blaming others. | | | | and no one but you can decide if you want to walk |
| They are kind and attentive. | | | | down the path again. Loving and risking your heart, |
| They freely admit mistakes and want to make | | | | again, is the hardest decision anyone can make. But, |
| amends. | | | | efforts to love and rebuild a worthwhile relationship |
| They admit their actions or words were invalid or | | | | are never wasted. |
| wrong. | | | | Be sure to balance your expectations and |
| They have better attitudes, more upbeat and | | | | shortcomings before making the final decision to get |
| positive. | | | | back together with your ex. Be absolutely certain |
| They show respectful behavior and want to get | | | | that you want your ex back, and that your feelings |
| back together. | | | | are not mixed with jealousy or anger knowing that |
| They are committed and do not want to repeat the | | | | they have moved on and continued to live without |
| past. | | | | you. It's easy to get hung up on the small stuff and |
| They are willing to listen and learn from constructive | | | | completely miss the real issue at hand. |